CRUNCH TIME: Study your group
by Sarah Milstead
UHCLIDIAN STAFF

With finals fast approaching, many will turn to study groups for mental, emotional and academic support to ready themselves for the looming battle ahead.

I speak of the fight for your grade, that metaphorical line over which you and your professor stand toe-to-toe. This is the time of semester when you can cower in fear or defiantly look your teacher in the eye and say, "Ha! You call that a final? I know hard tests when I see them, and THAT, my dear professor, was NOT a hard test!"

That last bit should be said to yourself, for the sake of your grade; and try not to smirk - your teacher will know what you're thinking.

Your comrades in preparation for this battle will vary in face and name, but the same people show up in virtually every study group. They are the Dictator, the Genius, the Know-It-All, and the Freeloader.

First, we have the Dictator, the boss, the absolute authority on what should be studied, how it should be discussed, and when breaks should be taken. The Dictator does not like to have his authority questioned and brooks no dissention in the ranks. Indeed, the smallest hint of rebellion is punishable by sarcastic put-downs and exile to a different Starbucks.

No one knows how the Dictator came to power, but we do know this - he wasn't elected.

At first glance, the Genius and the Know-It-All may seem to hold the same rank, but the two actually hold very different positions. You see, the Know-It-All thinks he knows everything and the Genius actually does.

The Know-It-All is the absolute authority on everything that will come up at the study group (and anything that won't). From calculus, to history, to Feng Shui and muffler repair., if teachers gave points for detailed imagination, this would be the guy to quote.

In a perfect world, the Know-It-All would keep all the useless tidbits of information he thinks he knows to himself and the Genius would speak up more.

But the Genius is usually the quiet one in the operation, contributing only when asked by anyone else in the group, smart enough to figure out the Know-It-All doesn't. On the march towards an "A," it is a successful group who figures out who the best source of Intel is, and who might as well be a mole for an enemy regime.

What can you say about the Freeloader? Like France, he won't be there for the work but is always there when he needs you. Unobtrusive and content to be led by the Dictator, the Freeloader is most likely to mistake the Know-It-All for the Genius.

Don't think to avoid the pitfalls of one character by doubling up on another. Each type contributes equally to a balanced dynamic.

In the great wheel of school, Simba, it's the circle of cram.

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